Intermezzo: Sorting My Ducks

Good day, family and friends!

I know, it's been a month and a half since my last post. My general plan is to post at least twice a month, but as John Lennon said, "life's what happens while you're making plans." For those of you who have been following my (lengthy) series on Healthcare in America, I do intend to finish off my suggestions and post the bibliography. I also have articles on racism, Islam, journalism, and progressivism planned. For right now, however, I just need to do a basic brain dump in an attempt to get my ducks in a row.

Something that has been preying on my mind for awhile is the degeneration of the most basic social skills. "What social skills are those?" you may be asking yourself. Simple: basic common courtesy and consideration for those around you.

Every day, I am confronted with numerous examples of overly common behavior in today's society that would never have been tolerated when I was a child 40 years ago. Here are a few:

Past: a gentleman or lady would never have been caught cursing in public (though that social convention was usually overlooked for men in extreme situations). Foul language was used regularly only by the coarsest, most low-class individuals who lived on the fringes of society.

Present: a prominent celebrity with pretensions to the White House uses the infamous "F-bomb" three times during a motivational speech to a Women's group. It's bad enough he was being foul-mouthed in public, but doing so in front of an all-female audience would, in the past, have gotten him excoriated at the very least.

Past: people caring for their yards would gather up and bag their grass, hedge, and tree clippings. Not doing so would have most likely resulted in that person being censured by his neighbors, possibly even fined for littering in certain municipalities.

Present: anyone with a leaf blower feels they have the right to blow any and all detritus out of their yard and into the public street where it is left subject to the whims of wind, rain, and traffic. They have the attitude that "its only an eyesore if its in my yard!"

Past: people doing business with each other addressed each other politely and used formal honorifics such as "Sir" and "Ma'am."

Present: formalities such as these are all too often denounced by younger adults (under 40) as "empty," "meaningless," or "dishonest." People using these honorifics are often accused of being condescending. (I actually had a customer yell at me over the phone once because I kept addressing her as "Ma'am" instead of by her first name. I finally said to her, "I am sorry if my using "Ma'am" has offended you, but you are speaking to an office in Texas. I was born and raised in this region and addressing a customer as "Sir" or "Ma'am" is drilled into us as simple common courtesy from the moment we begin speaking. I am sorry if you were raised in an area where manners were not taught and I will try to use your first name, but please keep in mind that you are asking me to overcome 45 years of conditioning in the space of 30 seconds." She didn't say anything the next time I slipped in that conversation and addressed her as "Ma'am.")

There are many, many more I could share...particularly pertaining to traffic. I believe I summarized this degradation of basic etiquette best when I once quipped, "when the demagogues tried to create a classless society, all they managed to create was a society with no class." Don't get me wrong, even though I portray and am descended from German Nobility, I am very happy to live in a society that has no formal class structure. Sure, there will always be an underlying "Good-ol'-boy" cronyism network of some sort, but for the most part, America's social classes are based on merit. Through the application of hard work, perseverance, and more than a little brain power, Americans born into the lowest strata of our society can and do attain the highest heights, and vice-versa. When a "Good-ol'-boy" barrier is encountered, it will usually crumble in the light of exposure to the public.

American author Robert Heinlein once referred to niceties and formal honorifics as "Civilization Lubrication." I believe he was right, but I extend his definition beyond the language. The way we behave with those whom we encounter every day can be another form of "Civilization Lubrication." Human society is the ultimate machine made up of myriad rubbing parts. When you throw the sands of rudeness, inconsideration, and selfishness into the machine, friction will increase and create unnecessary heat and abrasion. On the other hand, if you choose to lubricate the machine of our society with kindness, politesse, and courtesy, then you reduce the friction and allow the machine to work at peak efficiency.

Maybe its time for those who decry the "tone of debate" with foul language, those who revel in performers who use language that would flay the paint off a battleship, those who believe that it doesn't matter where garbage lands as long as it is not on their property to try a little lubricant instead of sand.

Or, as radio talk show host Sean Rima is fond of saying, "Be good to each other and don't be a jerk!"

Next time: back to my Healthcare summary.

Until then, best regards...



© James P. Rice 2011